Poetry

First

Let me tell you about all my firsts

So you can learn everything and nothing about me

Stories to make you giggle, cringe, squirm or judge.

Starting with bad taste in music, clothes and people.

There was Britney Spears and S Club 7

There was glitter, flares, velcro and velvet

There was a girl who teased me and a boy who taunted me

So many things that I could make better second choices of.

*

First kiss; I’ll answer with my head in my hands

First love; didn’t exist. Silly question.

*

Now let’s get serious; first time you felt fear?

Now this is a tough one because I can’t choose

Did I fear for myself more than him all those years before?

That’s turned into the question of who I loved more

Expansion of the timeline as more first times occur

The emotions get fuzzy – sure I’ve felt happiness

Just don’t question those five empty years –

Other firsts were experienced then.

*

First panic attack; midnight, date irrelevant.

First actual panic attack; about a month later.

*

Do you want me to continue – or have you heard enough?

I’m not finished yet, not even close I’m sorry

See, I haven’t had much time for round two’s

As I’m still learning by making mistakes.

Learn what you can about me from lisped words

So you can now make inaccurate judgements

Mismatched stories to fit the pre-created image

Of a person even I am yet to understand.

 

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6 thoughts on “First

  1. What a way to start my birthday. So much fear you can touch it, it feels that near. Close your eyes and shed a tear. Face the world, make it clear, be rid of that negative atmosphere. In poetry you can vent that anger now find a friend don’t be a stranger.

    Liked by 1 person

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